It may not be the worst hours every, but it is so draining. What I do every day is make sure we have all of the donations we need, I organize them, I make lists for everything we have and all of the volunteers we are acquiring as well as all of the participants. I have had to go through all of the curriculum and make sure that everything is the way we want it. This past week I have been helping a lot with decorations, climbing on 12 foot + ladders to put signs up, huge 3D planes and such. I am breaking a sweat just thinking about it.
Well I guess the thing that has been bothering me about VBS is that I feel Satan's constant attack. It is true that he prowls about like a roaring lion looking for prey to devour. He can tell we are doing the Lord's work and he is attacking at all sides to stop us from reaching these kids. Let me tell you a little bit about what has been going on, with no names of course :P
"Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour."
- 1 Peter 5:8
So, to begin with my grandfather has been placed in a home. I don't remember if I mentioned it before hand, but he has vascular dementia and Alzheimer's. It has slowly getting worse, and since I stayed with them last summer it has gotten so bad. He doesn't remember his own daughters, and sometimes he can't figure out how to open a door or hold cutlery properly. If you knew him you would realize how foreign this is for him. He used to complain about how everyone didn't know how to properly hold a spoon whilst eating soup (there is a certain way to do so). Anyways, for him to not know this, to not recognize his wife of over 50 years, it is extremely disheartening. He can't remember days, or keep track of time. He can't cloth himself and is so dangerous to have around. He actually began to threaten everyone before we managed to place him in a lock down security home just a couple of days ago.
The second thing that I noticed was some stuff surrounding my family. I can't explain online due to confidentiality stuff, even though I would like to. Well anyways, there is a big closing date coming up, but the stress from the possible outcome is eating me and the rest of my family alive. We honestly can't breathe until this all gets cleared up. We are definitely praying that it comes to a close.
Thirdly is a whole new situation that we learned about on Sunday. My uncle had an affair with someone for 5 months and the way that it was discovered was not exactly pleasant. Now there are emotions running rampant throughout the family; of distrust, hatred, disgust, and depression. Honestly I don't know what hurts more, the fact that that he did he betrayed the family, or that everyone is counselling for a divorce to happen after 36 years of marriage. So this has been on my mind, causing me to have little sleep, and distracting me from God's Kingdom work (VBS).
One thing that has really been frustrating me is that because I am only the intern here at work I am not treated the same as, say, the rest of the staff on pay roll. Mostly because I am only 18, just a few years older than a lot of the younger leaders' children. This past week my supervisor and I have been extremely frustrated because of the way we were treated (mostly me) towards an issue for VBS. We thankfully worked it out, and God has been good, convicting those that didn't treat me the way they should have, but I still sometimes wish I was older.
Well anyways, with everything that is going on I just feel the weight continually crashing down. Oh. I almost forgot. Today when my boss and I went out for lunch, just to get out of the office, we stopped at a Christian establishment and right after we finished praying a couple beside us pulled out Taro cards (cards that are used for seeing into the future) and began reading them for each other. We both stopped eating and began praying loud enough that they could hear us if they tuned in. We prayed for God's protection and such and then we went inside, and found a pastor sitting right close by. Just as he was about to come and speak to them about doing that in the building they packed up and left! The feeling of unease that had swept over me since the first moment they pulled out those cards left. It was actually scary how affected everyone around us felt.
So I guess what I am trying to say with everything that has been going on is that Satan is trying to distract my boss and I from doing His work. We have 90 kids signed up for VBS, 25 in preschool with 3 on a waiting list, and the rest in the elementary group. We have room for 100 and we start on Monday. We have never had this many kids for VBS before so it is incredible to see so many children, many unsaved coming to church to learn about Christ. Satan sees this as an opportunity to turn these little ones away from Christ, but we aren't letting some distractions in our life stop us. We have actually committed to praying with each other right when we get to the office, before work distracts us as well.
The amazing peace that has come over us in the last couple of days has been incredible and the amount of donations that we have received are also overwhelming. We have an overflow of donations, enough that we can actually use some to pay for some of our fall children's ministry!
I will continue to pray that we wont let Satan's distractions work and keep us from God's work. I will also continue to pray for those in my family and everything else that has been happening, including my one brother getting beaten up in a situation that he calls "spiritual" due to the bizarre nature of it. Absolutely unbelievable what Satan has attempted to do in my life recently, and it is due to these frustrating experiences that I know that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing.
"Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward in heaven is great; for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."
- Matthew 5:10-12
I will stand firm on His rock. I will trust in Him. I will not look to the right or the left, but only praise his name.
Praising God through the storms,
Not-So-Princess Lizzie
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